Now that the current administration has listed the Polar Bear as an endangered species, even though their numbers have been going up and not down, its time for the Marxist environmental movement to find a new victim. Introducing the Walrus.
Now that the cute and cuddly Polar Bear whose identity has been co-opted by Coke commercials at Christmas, (I hate to say it but Polar Bears and Penguins do not exist together) and fluffy toys have been given it the stasis of hate crime victim amongst the soccer mom crowd, its time to turn the tide on the Walrus.
The Walrus has always been shown with vigorous honesty unlike the false advertising of Polar Bear. The Walrus is ugly, fat, has big teeth looking tusks, their lazy (hey I have some friends that look like this). The Walrus has always been the goofy 3rd tier comic relief side kick of any documentary in cold water climes.
Plus the baby seal is sooooo 1970.
The whale is so 1980.
Soon enough you will see the typical fear mongers decry the plight of this affable bumpkin, the southern redneck of the polar caps. Putting a human face on the poor misunderstood Walrus. Guys will be told to relate to the bushy whiskers and large guts and how they attract their mate. The women drawn to their nurturing instincts. Some top of the fold article will admire it for being the only mammal with a two foot long bone inside its penis. The Walrus oosik is a very prized item amongst Alaskans and at auction for its uniqueness.
The Polar Bear is so 2000.
The decade of 2010 is all about the Walrus.
Now that the cute and cuddly Polar Bear whose identity has been co-opted by Coke commercials at Christmas, (I hate to say it but Polar Bears and Penguins do not exist together) and fluffy toys have been given it the stasis of hate crime victim amongst the soccer mom crowd, its time to turn the tide on the Walrus.
The Walrus has always been shown with vigorous honesty unlike the false advertising of Polar Bear. The Walrus is ugly, fat, has big teeth looking tusks, their lazy (hey I have some friends that look like this). The Walrus has always been the goofy 3rd tier comic relief side kick of any documentary in cold water climes.
Plus the baby seal is sooooo 1970.
The whale is so 1980.
Soon enough you will see the typical fear mongers decry the plight of this affable bumpkin, the southern redneck of the polar caps. Putting a human face on the poor misunderstood Walrus. Guys will be told to relate to the bushy whiskers and large guts and how they attract their mate. The women drawn to their nurturing instincts. Some top of the fold article will admire it for being the only mammal with a two foot long bone inside its penis. The Walrus oosik is a very prized item amongst Alaskans and at auction for its uniqueness.
The Polar Bear is so 2000.
The decade of 2010 is all about the Walrus.
